


Pas De Deux

by jiminthestreets_bonesinthesheets



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ballerina Dean, Ballet, Ballet Dancer Castiel (Supernatural), Ballet Dancer Dean Winchester, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Dancer Castiel (Supernatural), Dancer Dean Winchester, First Kiss, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, References to The Nutcracker, Romantic Fluff, SO MUCH FLUFF, Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, Shy Dean Winchester, Supportive Sam Winchester, The Nutcracker, The Nutcracker Ballet, ballerina cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 07:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28467864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jiminthestreets_bonesinthesheets/pseuds/jiminthestreets_bonesinthesheets
Summary: Dean is a closeted ballet dancer, and Cas is playing the Nutcracker Prince in the Kansas State Ballet. When the ballet loses their Clara and Cas confronts Dean about taking the part along side him, will he be able to put aside his fears and let everyone know who he really is? All to help the man of his dreams?
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 23
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

The sky was dark and starless as Dean pulled the impala into the empty parking lot behind the old brick building. As soon as he cut the engine he felt the instant drop in temperature hit his exposed skin, enticing him to quickly grab his bag and dart across the parking lot as fast as he could. It was coming into fall now, and it was an unseasonably cold September night as he stepped out of the car. The back door was left slightly ajar as it always was, the bright yellow mop bucket propping it open as Dean snuck inside and closed the door behind him. Once he was inside the warmth of the heated building, and his shivering had subsided, he smiled while he watched for a moment as the janitor shimmied across the floor to the beat of the music pumping through his headphones. With a slight chuckle he walked over and gave the man a light tap.

“Hey, Garth.” The man turned to him and shifted his headphones down to his neck as Dean reached a hand into his duffle bag. “I got your weekly offering, and thanks again for keeping the door open for me, man, I really appreciate it.”

“It's no problemo, my friend,” Garth smiled wide as he eyed the case of beer he was being handed, placing it on the bottom of his janitor's cart, “always happy to help a friend in need. And as always studio nine upstairs is open for you.”

Dean nodded in thanks and hiked his duffle back over his shoulder, and headed up the stairs. He made his way to studio nine and walked into the mirrored room, dropping his duffle and connected his phone to the bluetooth speakers. He put on some light music and did a few quick stretches before looking at the clock. It was just about midnight, which meant that he had around three hours to practice before he had to be home. So without wasting any more time he got into position, pointed his toes, pushed play, and began his practice of the first dance of the Nutcracker Ballet.

~~~~~~~~~~~

The week passed by as quickly as it always did, and the weekend passed agonizingly slowly as Dean waited for Monday night to come. Don't get him wrong, Dean loved spending time at home with his mom and brother Sam, but he found that every second his feet weren’t tucked snugly into his pointe shoes, he was anxious and fidgety, eager for Monday night so he could get himself back into the studio.

He had been practicing so hard over the last year, trying his best to teach himself every step perfectly, though without any formal training he was sure he would never be as good as the ballet dancers he watched online. The ones from the videos he used to try and teach himself the steps. And trying to do it at home in his basement wasn't making it any easier. Trying to make sure that Sam and his mom never never walked in on him practicing, keeping the music low to make sure they didn't wake up in the middle of the night and hear it, catch him in the act. But when one of his childhood friends got a job as the night janitor at a local ballet studio, he was thrilled. He knew all it would take was the weekly promise of a case of beer and Garth would sneak him in, he was always good like that. That way he wouldn't have to worry about his mom or brother sneaking in on him in tights and pointe shoes, having to explain that embarrassing situation to them, and he could practice Monday to Friday while they were asleep without any anxiety about it. And the arrangement had been working perfectly… until now.

It was finally Monday night and he snuck into the dance studio, same as he always did. Made his way up to studio nine and danced his heart out until around three in the morning. After he was finished, the sweat pouring down his body was a clear indication of a hell of a good practice, he grabbed up his things and made his way back down stairs. He was just about to slip out the back door to head home when he stopped halfway out, the sound of music coming from down the hall hitting his ears. 

He went back inside and closed the door quietly, sneaking down the hall to find the room where the music was coming from. But it worried him slightly to hear the music, aside from him and Garth no one was ever in the building at night, especially this late. What if this meant he couldn't do this anymore, what if he couldn't sneak into the studio at night because someone who actually went to this studio, who actually paid to use the building, was going to be practicing here nightly. And there would be nothing Dean could do about it. On a mechanics salary there was no way he would ever be able to afford to pay for use of a studio, and he couldn't risk bumping into someone that might get Garth in trouble for sneaking him into the building every night. It would be the end of Dean's secret ballet sessions, and he couldn't go back to trying to practice in his basement at night, it would only be a matter of time before Sam or his mom caught him, and he really did not want to have to deal with that.

Eventually he found the room where the music was coming from, studio two by the front of the building, and peaked his head in the doorway to see who it was. It was a man he didn't recognize, but as soon as he laid eyes on him he was instantly entranced. He had never in his life seen anyone move as gracefully as he did. Every line, every transition was pure perfection, the kind of dancer that Dean aspired to be. Dean couldn't help himself but stare as the dark haired man continued his perfect rendition of the Nutcracker, the very ballet he himself had been working on for months now. He watched for an unknown amount of time in the doorway, in awe of his elegance and grace, before eventually the music stopped and he took that as his cue to leave before he was caught. 

Just as he was about to turn down the hall he was met by Garth coming to stand beside him, both now watching as the dark haired man stretched against the bars on the mirror. “Who is he?”

“His name is Castiel,” Garth answered, leaning against his mop, “I completely forgot he was coming, sorry man.”

“Nothing to be sorry for,” he shrugged then turned slightly towards Garth to ask, “why's he here so late? I mean, I know why I sneak around the studio at ungodly hours, but he doesn't look like he's ashamed of being a ballerina. He's clearly taken classes, so why be here alone at three in the morning?”

“He's part of the Kansas State Ballet. They recently decided to move from their previous studio and are now taking up residence here. They are going to be performing The Nutcracker Ballet for Christmas.”

“Seriously?!”

Garth nodded, “Castiel is playing the role of the Nutcracker Prince. Apparently he's the most dedicated member of the team, and most nights stays late for extra practice. So if you're going to keep coming there is a chance you two might cross paths at some point, it sounds like he’ll be here a lot, but I'll do my best to make sure that doesn't happen.”

“Hey, man, I don't wanna get you in trouble,” he shook his head, “if the owner of the studio finds out you've been sneaking me in here at night you'll lose your job.”

Garth just waved him off, “Even if at some point Castiel does see you here, I don't think he would be the type to go running to mommy about it. Keep coming, Dean, don't give up your dancing.”

“As long as you're sure,” he eyed him, “but if at any time you start to get worried you're gunna lose your job, you tell me and I'll stop coming.”

“Deal.” He gave Dean's arm a light smack, then as they watched Castiel beginning to gather up his things and ready to leave, they both turned away from studio two and walked back down the hallway together. “I'll walk you out, man, and I better see you tomorrow night.”

Dean smiled and clutched at the strap of his duffel as they walked. He was glad he had Garth, and glad that he didn't have to stop dancing or start sneaking around the house again. “Don't worry, I'll be here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days Dean continued to return to the studio every night, just as he promised Garth he would. For the most part he always arrived there before Castiel, did his two to three hours of practice up in studio nine, and every night before he left he would sneak over to studio two and watch Castiel dance. So far everything had been going fine. They hadn't crossed paths, and Castiel hadn't caught Dean watching him from the doorway. And tonight was just the same as all the others.

Dean had practiced extra hard tonight. He managed to sneak out of his house an hour earlier than usual, then when he was finished he made his way down to studio two to watch Castiel dance for a few minutes before leaving. He was currently standing in the doorway to Castiel's studio, watching him dance the steps to act one scene six where the Nutcracker dances with Clara, when the shifting of his feet had him knocking over a mop that Garth had left leaning against the wall. He instantly panicked, and in a futile attempt to save the mop and not alert Castiel of his presence there, he lunged forwards to grab the mop, but the damage had already been done. 

Castiel was mid dance when he heard the commotion at the door behind him and swiftly turned. He was now staring at a very stunned Dean clutching tightly to a mop and now standing a few feet inside the studio.

“Can I help you?” Cas asked with a quirked brow.

“I…” Dean scrambled and practically threw the mop off to the side, turning and grabbing his bag before darting back towards the door, “No, sorry, I was just leaving, I didn't mean to scare you.”

Confused but also a little intrigued, Castiel took a step closer and called out to him, “Do you dance here?” Stopping Dean from leaving.

He turned back to Cas, a little confused, and when he didn't say anything Castiel pointed to the duffel slung over his shoulder and asked again, “Are you a dancer at this studio?”

“No, no I don't go here.”

It was Castiel's turn to be confused now, not to mention slightly scared. He was, after all, in a studio in the middle of the night, alone, now faced with a random stranger who apparently had no reason for being there in the first place. “Then… how did you get in here?” He asked as he started taking slow steps back, trying to get to his phone, “And why are you in here?”

“No, no!'' Dean realized what was happening, what Castiel was thinking, and held his hands up in a gesture of innocence. “It's not what you think! I’m not some creepy weirdo, I promise.”

“If you don't dance at this studio then why are you here and how did you get in?” He asked with a little more force this time.

Dean just sighed and figured since he had finally been caught, and now he’d have to go back to square one of not having a practice area, he might as well just tell the truth. He’d had a good run, but obviously it wasn't meant to be. “Look, I don't… I don't take lessons here, I've actually never taken lessons anywhere, but I love ballet.'' Castiel just stood and watched him with an unchanged expression, so Dean continued, “When I was younger, my mom convinced my sports loving, man's man of a dad to take my family to The Nutcracker Ballet when it rolled through town. I was really young but I remember it so well, and ever since I've been fascinated by it. But with my dad being the way he was, being a man of sports himself, I didn't really have a choice and he put me into every sports team he could find. I played lacrosse, hockey, baseball, soccer, basketball, rugby, you name it I've played it, and it got to a point where I felt that if I told my dad I hated sports and wanted to be a ballerina instead, he would have hated me. So I played all the sports he wanted me to play so that I wouldn’t disappoint him, and I decided to just secretly teach myself as much ballet as I could with the resources I could find online. 

And so, when I found out a buddy of mine was the night janitor here, I made a deal with him. He lets me in after hours when everyone has left for the night so I can use a room upstairs to practice, and I give him something in return. I only do it because if anyone found out that I was in love with ballet, I would be the laughing stock of the town and my family. My dad would have been furious, and I don't even know what my mom and brother would say. Not to mention the fact that I would never be able to afford to take lessons or rent a studio here, not as a mechanic anyways. But this, sneaking in, was the one way I could still dance and keep everyone around me happy, so I could do what I love in peace.”

When Dean finished he took a deep breath and waited for Castiel's inevitable explosion. It was only natural that he would explode, afterall Dean was taking advantage of Garth's position, using the facility for free, and was now interfering with the practice time of a member of the state ballet. But instead, all he did was nod. He didn't say anything, didn't even really look at Dean, just nodded. Which in Dean's mind was worse than having him yell at him.

After a few more agonizing minutes of silence between them, he took a few cautious steps forwards and practically begged, “Please don't tell anyone about this. I don't care about myself, but I don't want to get Garth in trouble. The whole thing was my hair brained scheme, I don't want him to lose his job over me. And after tonight I promise you'll never see me again. I’m so sorry for disturbing you.”

He turned to leave, and this time he made it almost out the door before he was stopped again by Castiel. “Why will I never see you again?”

He slowly turned back, brows furrowed, “I just assumed that you'd tell the owner about me. I mean, I am using the studio for free, which I know I shouldn't be, but-”

“I'm not going to tell anyone.'' Dean opened his mouth to ask why, why he wouldn't tell the owner about what he had been doing, but nothing came out. Instead Castiel continued and answered the unasked question himself, “I would never step in the way of someone trying to hold onto their passion.”

“Really?!” 

Castiel nodded and took a few steps towards Dean who was still stunned, “I know that ballet is not exactly seen as manly, but you shouldn't be ashamed of letting people know it's a passion of yours. Though I understand having a father that would frown upon the decision.”

“Yeah, it's… it's not easy getting over the fear of how people will look at me differently when they find out, and…” He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “My dad, he made me out to be just like him, rough, tough, manly, and sports driven. So it's the only way people have ever seen me. If people knew I loved ballet, that I danced around in tights to music played by an orchestra, it would change my entire life.”

“It doesn't sound like your father is still in the picture, unless that's too personal an inquiry. If so, please feel free to ignore it.”

“No, it's okay,” he shook his head with a sad smile, “he actually passed away about four years ago. And even though he's been gone for that long, it's still hard to try and get past that fear he built into me, that if I was seen doing anything even remotely feminine he would be disappointed in me. It's so hard pressed into my brain that I should be ashamed of what I'm doing here. That's why I sneak out of my house at midnight after my mom and brother are sleeping, and I always make sure I'm home before they wake up. I'm terrified of what they would say if they found out, of how they would treat me, and it's all because of my dad's perceptions. It's… It's hard to get past.”

Cas nodded and reached out to place a gentle hand on Dean's shoulder in support, “You're right, it is very hard to get over something like that, but perhaps in time you will be able to let the world see the real you.”

“That would be nice, I hate sneaking around, I hate hiding something that I'm so passionate about,” he looked up at Cas, “to finally be free to be myself.”

“It's a great feeling, it truly is,” he then, much to Dean’s disappointment, moved his hand from Dean’s shoulder to hold it out in front of him, “I’m Castiel Novak, by the way”

“I know,” Dean smiled as he took Castiel's hand and shook it, “Garth told me your name, and that you're a part of the Kansas State Ballet. You're playing the Nutcracker Prince in this year's performance.”

“That's right,” Cas returned his beaming smile, clearly proud of his position in the ballet, “I have waited my entire career to play this part and I cannot wait to finally be on stage as the Nutcracker Prince.”

“I bet! And my name's Dean Winchester. Actually…” He rubbed a hand against the back of his neck and blushed slightly as he confessed, “I've been trying to teach myself The Nutcracker this year. I've been practicing the moves for months now, and I'm almost through getting the steps down for most of the ballet. As best I can, that is, I actually have no formal training.”

“That is actually very impressive, Dean! Ballet is not an easy thing to learn, and teaching yourself is quite a feat.”

Dean blushed even harder at Castiel's words, “It definitely was not easy. But I've been working at secretly teaching myself ballet for over ten years now, and-” He was cut short by his watch chiming and startling the both of them. He looked down at the time and panicked when he realized that he had been talking to Cas for almost half an hour, and it was now almost four in the morning. Sam would be getting up soon for work and he did not want to explain to his brother why his car wasn't in the driveway when he left for work. “Crap I gotta go! I have to get home before my early-bird-gets-the-worm brother wakes up and realizes I'm not in the house. But it was nice to meet you Cas, and thanks for not ratting me out.”

“Perhaps I'll see you again, at least I hope that I will,” and he couldn't help it if he blushed a bit too, then added, “and next time feel free to come in and watch rather than standing by the door like a creeper.”

Just before Dean was fully out the door, he turned back to smile at Cas one more time and said,“I'll take you up on that offer, good night, Cas!” And sent a wink at the still blushing Cas and then turned and ran out of the studio.

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

After meeting Cas the week before, Dean would make sure that at the end of every one of his practice sessions, he left enough time to sneak downstairs and spend half an hour watching Cas practice. But on his way into the studio tonight, he snuck a peek down the hallway and noticed that Cas’s usual practice room was dark, door closed. He was disappointed that Cas wouldn't be there tonight, but he tried to shrug it off and use his practice to try and keep his mind off of the blue eyed dancer. 

He was about halfway through his practice of act two scene eleven, when clapping from behind him startled him out of his trance and he turned towards the door. Though he turned a little too fast, and what were seconds ago graceful and coordinated movements, had Dean tripping across the dance floor and nearly landing him on his ass. 

Cas’s deep gravely laugh sent shivers through his spine as he caught his footing and walked closer to Cas. “Hey, Cas!”

“Hello, Dean,” he answered as he too started walking further into the room. 

“Wasn't it you who told me not to stand in the door and watch like a creeper?”

Cas laughed along with Dean and shifted off the doorframe to stand properly, now face to face with him, "That was very impressive, especially for someone with no formal training at all."

"Thanks," he beamed with pride at the compliment. Afterall, if an amazing and well known dancer such as Castiel Novak was saying he was impressive, then he must be doing something right.

"And I see you have chosen to teach yourself the role of Clara."

He blushed a little and turned away, rubbing the back of his neck, “She was always my favourite. She's kind of like the underdog, you know. She gets pulled into this crazy world and in the end she ends up coming out on top and winning the love of her prince charming.

“She is an amazing character," he nodded and agreed, "and very inspiring."

"Yeah, she is. And she gets her prince in the end, which is nice too," he smiled to himself for a moment then looked back up to Cas, “I thought maybe you ditched practice today, didn't see you in room two when I got here.”

"We started on stage rehearsals in the town theater today, and we ended up being there longer than I expected today, so I was a little late," he looked up and smirked at Dean, "sorry for worrying you."

Dean just smirked back and shuffled his feet slightly, then asked, "So, was it really good? My dancing?"

"It was, I was very impressed at your progress." Dean smiled, proud of himself, and also blushed a little at Castiel's praises. "Though you do need a little work on some of your lines."

Cas then pushed off the wall, smirk still plastered on his face, and wiggled his finger at a now mezmorized Dean as he walked to the front of the studio. Dean, followed him mindlessly and stood front and center as Cas changed the music on Dean's phone, then came back to stand beside him as the music started. 

The song that played was the song for the first time Clara and the Nutcracker dance, after she sneaks out of bed and goes to check on her beloved Nutcracker. Dean's stomach dropped a little as Cas came to stand behind him, his nerves tingling at their ends, butterflies violently attacking his stomach at just how close Cas was to him. 

The music started to play and Dean instantly got into position, though still very aware of Cas's closeness, especially when his breath hit his ear as he spoke, "Go through the steps, I'll show you where to extend as we go through the motions together."

Dean nodded and gracefully stepped into the first few steps of the dance. He knew Cas was watching him intently, he could see his eyes on him when he turned, could almost feel the lust pouring off of the man as he continued the dance. But as the music poured over him, he put himself fully into the role of Clara, closing his eyes and letting her completely take over his body. Then Cas's hands were on him, slowly roaming softly over his body as they danced. 

Cas's hand came to rest on Dean's waist from behind, and the other ran down his left arm as he lifted it up. He was now leaning back into Cas as they moved together as one, and he was sure Cas could feel the shivers vibrating through his body as Cas whispered against his neck, “Extend more, push the movements straight out through your arms, feel it at your fingertips." 

Dean did as he said, eyes closed and tried to focus on his breathing, the movements of the dance, on Cas's hands still roaming his body as he continued the dance pressed tightly against Dean. His whispered praises against his neck had Dean in pure bliss, the hot breath against his skin as he whispered, "Good, Dean, very good. Keep going."

And he did. They performed the entire dance together and Dean had never in his life felt so connected to anyone, so open and vulnerable yet so free to be completely and wholly himself. And before he knew it the night had passed. Hours had flown by in a flurry of roaming hands, hot mingled breaths, lips brushing skin, noses touching…

An alarm broke the moment, ripping Dean out of his dazed euphoria and back to his unfortunate reality. He gasped and pushed himself away from a confused Cas and ran to his phone. His eyes went wide as he realized it was already after three in the morning. Sam was going to be getting up for work soon, and he still had to drive home and sneak into the house without Sam noticing. But he had been so caught up in himself and Castiel that he didn't even realize they had been dancing for so long. 

"Dean…" Cas stepped towards where Dean was tossing his things in his duffel, "Everything ok? Was… was it me? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no! Absolutely not!” He quickly reassured him while still tossing things in his duffel, “I’m sorry, Cas, I have to get home before my family wakes up!" 

And before Cas could say another word, he was watching Dean run out of the studio. 

~~~~~~~~~~~


	2. Chapter 2

Since the first night Dean had danced with Cas, it was all he could think about. The intensity of their chemistry, even after only a few hours, was a feeling he would never forget, and one he had never known. It became something he craved all day long when he wasn't at the studio, and weekends were pure torture for him. And every night after the first night, when Dean would sneak his way into the dance studio, rather than going upstairs to his usual room, he had started going straight to Cas's practice room on the first floor. 

The two of them practised together every night for almost a month, and with every night not only did Dean's dancing improve, but so did their unspoken bond. They could both feel it. And by the end of the month, they had just about made it to the last dance between Clara and the Nutcracker. A dance Dean was very much looking forward to, especially since it called for a great deal of intimacy between the two leads. He was anxious to dance it with Cas, and they were almost there. 

It was nearing almost three in the morning by this point, the two of them were sweaty and sore and all danced out for the night, so they decided to pack it in. Dean had to get home anyways, Sam would be waking up very soon and the last thing he needed was his little brother asking questions. 

Cas walked over to his bag as Dean sat back against the mirror at the front to take off his shoes. He grabbed two bottles of water out of his bag and tossed one to Dean. 

"Heads up!" Dean caught it, giving him a nod in thanks, before opening it and practically downing it in one go. Cas walked over to sit beside him, and decided now was as good a time as any to ask. "So Dean, we have stage rehearsals at the theater tomorrow night, so I won't be here to practise with you." He could see the disappointment Dean tried to hide, and hoped that it was a good indication that he would get the answer he was hoping for. "I was wondering if you'd like to come to the theater tomorrow night, sit in and watch the rehearsal. The doors are guarded while we are in there rehearsing, but I can leave your name with security if you would like to come."

"I would actually love to come and watch!" He nodded enthusiastically, "It's been so long since I've been to the theater to see a performance, and I would love to see you in action with actual professionals."

Cas nearly sighed in relief, he was so hoping Dean would say yes. "Great! Rehearsals don't start until seven tomorrow night, so come any time after that."

Dean just smiled, took off his shoes, and hurried out of the studio. He just wanted to get through tomorrow so he could go to the theater and watch Cas.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean was sitting in the parking lot of the theater, had been for the last fifteen minutes. He was excited to watch Cas dance with the ballet, but he was also super nervous to be there. What if someone saw him, told his mom or brother that he was hanging around the theater. But after a few more minutes of deep breathing, he finally gathered up enough courage to practically run across the parking lot, praying that he wouldn't be caught. But his urge to see Cas seemed to be out weighing that little bit of fear, that and the thought of seeing Cas on stage. 

When he made it to the front doors to the theater, he was very quickly stopped by the guard placed there. A very large, burly man who almost growled at him, "Sorry, Sir, you can't be here. Rehearsals are going on at the moment."

"Actually I was invited here tonight," he shifted nervously from foot to foot as the guard stared him down, "Castiel Novak said he would leave my name with you, it's Dean Winchester."

The guard held up a finger to him, then turned a few steps away from him to speak quietly into a mouth piece on his jacket. After a few agonizing moments and the sudden worry that maybe he should just turn and run, he finally turned back to him. "Dean Winchester, you said?"

Dean nodded. 

"Got some ID?"

He nodded again and hurriedly rifled through his wallet for his driver's licence, holding it out for the guard to look at. Once he was satisfied, he pushed the door open and held it for Dean, "Go on in, just try to be quiet and sit wherever you'd like. Enjoy."

He nodded at the man as he walked by, practically ran past him and into the theater, quickly finding his way to the stage and quietly going inside. He was hit instantly by the all too familiar music he and Cas had been practicing to all month, and crept slowly to the front row to sit and watch as they finished the scene. 

His eyes were fixed on Cas the entire time the dancers moved around the stage. He looked amazing up there, powerful, completely in his element and owning every inch of the stage with every move he made. It was hard not to watch him. 

They finished the dance a few minutes later and the directors rushed the stage to chat with the dancers. Cas took that moment to finally glance towards the seats and saw Dean. He gave him a smile and a small wave, which Dean returned both.

A few minutes later the directors called for everyone to get back to their places and rerun the scene. 

Everything was going great. The dancers were hitting every step perfectly on cue, everyone was expertly coordinated, and Cas looked great as hell. Until suddenly things took a hard right mid dance. 

The girl playing Clara stumbled halfway through the dance and nearly fell flat on her ass center stage. Cas tried to reach out and steady her but she just angrily pushed him away and shouted to stop the music. 

"Stop! Stop everything!" The music paused and the entire hall went silent as she then rounded on Cas, throwing her hands in the air and yelling, "Seriously, Castiel, you messed up the steps again?! Am I expected to work with amateurs my entire life?!"

Cas merely rolled his eyes and in his regularly calm voice answered, "I wasn't the one who confused the steps, Ruby. You should be at least a foot ahead of me, you're too close, which is why you keep stumbling."

She scoffed and crossed her arms, "Just like you to blame it on me. You think you're the best dancer here just because you practice night and day, you think you're better than us."

"Castiel is right, Ruby," the director stepped in, "you're too close to him. This whole thing could be fixed if you just take one step forward."

"Why is this utter fiasco being blamed on me?!" She turned on the director. "Why don't you tell your precious golden boy here to properly learn the steps!"

"No one is blaming you for anything. It's an easy fix, just one step forward."

"You know what?" She shook her head and placed her fingers on her temples. "I am done with this poor excuse for a ballet! Good luck putting on this shit show without me!"

Everyone remained still and silent as Dean watched in complete horror while Ruby grabbed her bag from backstage, and promptly stormed down the stage steps and out the door. His eyes followed her all the way until the door slammed shut behind her, then he looked back up at Cas. He just shook his head, completely exhausted. Obviously this wasn't the first time they had to deal with an outburst from her. 

"Great! Just great!" One of the directors, the taller one, threw his notes in the air and ran tight fingers through his hair, "We have less than three months till the show debuts, and now we have to find and train another Clara for the show! It's impossible, we can't do it, show’s over!"

"We’ll find a way," the shorter director said, trying to calm the other, "we have to. Tickets are going on sale very soon and we are already expected to sell out. We can't cancel now, Chuck."

"Then what, Metatron, what do we do? Start auditioning again? Call back the people we rejected the first time? I’m sure they’ll love that!"

Metatron just shook his head and walked away, leaving Chuck to panic as well as the dancers on stage, who were all now gathering in groups and chatting frantically. Dean didn't know what to do other than just sit there in shock, he couldn't believe he had just watched one of the ballets lead roles walk out like that.

“Wait!'' Dean looked up to Cas with a start, and everyone else in the theater followed suit. “I may have someone who could help.”

Both directors gave Cas a skeptical look and waited for him to continue. Before he answered, Cas looked down at Dean with a frightening glint in his eyes that gave Dean the most frantic butterflies he had ever felt. 

“You know someone?” Metatron asked, almost slightly impatient.

“Yes, they already know all the parts of the ballet, all the acts and all the steps, start to finish.” Dean perked up a bit in his seat, not liking the look in Cas’s eyes at all. That sudden feeling to get up and run had returned to him again, but he was also frozen in place. Seemed his brain and legs couldn’t come to the same conclusion. “They are talented beyond all belief and absolutely perfect for the role of Clara.”

Dean finally found a little control over his limbs and managed to stand, letting out a low warning as he did. “Cas.”

Though Cas ignored it and continued on, “I have seen them perform the ballet numerous times. Their execution is perfect, flawless, seamless, the perfect lead for this ballet.”

“Cas…” Dean took a few steps toward the front of the stage, speaking his warning a little louder this time but still getting no reaction out of Cas.

“And our chemistry in the roles is already… intense, electric,” he then looked over at Dean who was staring back at him with a lust he could feel across the room, “even outside of dance we have a profound bond.”

“Cas…” He breathed, almost completely breathless. 

The two just stared at each other, the bond Cas had spoke of lighting the room with a fire that everyone there could feel.

“Well,” Chuck interrupted, pulling Cas's eyes away from Dean, “don't leave us in suspense! Who is it?!” 

“Though, bringing this person in to play the lead role would change the dynamics slightly, but it might end up being a good thing.”

“Who is it, Castiel?!” Chuck was nearly pulling his hair out. 

Cas turned back to look at Dean and everyone's eyes followed him. Dean just stood there, even more stunned then he was before, and now suddenly feeling trapped.

“Him?!” Metatron turned back to Cas who nodded. “Who even is he?”

“His name is Dean Winchester.”

“Let me get this straight,” Chuck took a few steps forwards, taking a second to rub a hand down his face before asking, quite annoyed, “you want us to let some random man off the street, someone I've never even heard of before, not only join our highly respected and prestigious ballet, but also play the lead?!”

“He is an amazing dancer,” Cas argued, “and he already knows the role, he would need very little training. Much less training then having to hire someone who might be a known dancer, but has never before danced The Nutcracker. And as you said, we don’t have much time.”

Chuck shook his head at Cas then rounded on Dean, “Where did you train?” Dean just opened his mouth and closed it again. “Who trained you?” Again, Dean wasn't able to say anything, just stand there awkwardly. So Chuck turned back to Castiel and threw his hands in the air, slapping them on his legs as he let them fall.

“I trained him,” Cas answered for Dean.

“You?!”

“Yes,” Cas nodded.

“So you mean to tell me that he has had no formal training?!”

“He's an amazing dancer,” Cas repeated, enunciating every word.

“No,” Chuck closed his eyes and shook his head, “no, no, no, no, no! Absolutely not! No!”

“At least let him show you what he can do. Let us dance the finale together. Once you see his skills and our chemistry, I promise you will change your minds.”

Chuck looked over to Metatron who gave him a shrug, “What harm could it do at this point.”

Chuck looked between Castiel and Dean, then just waved his hands and said, “Fine, do whatever you want then,” and threw himself in a chair in the front row and waited.

Cas walked down the steps and over to where Dean was still frozen in place and stood in front of him. 

“I… I can’t dance in front of people, Cas! Are you insane?!” He shook his head, breathless with nerves. “I’m a closeted dancer, not even my own mother or brother know that I dance! And now you not only want me to dance in front of the people in my own town, but then also travel around with you and dance in front of people nationwide?!”

“Dean, calm down,” he ran his hands down Dean's arms and it seemed to help a bit, “I know you have never told anyone about your passion for dancing before, but perhaps this is a sign. Maybe now is the time to just finally be you, to do what you love, to dance freely. At least give it a try, come on stage and dance with me and I promise you will love it.”

Dean just stared at him, mouth open and head slightly shaking. 

“Dean,” Cas breathed, stepping closer and placing a hand on his cheek which Dean turned into, closing his eyes, “just let go, fall with me.”

After a moment of just soaking Cas in, and feeling the comforting warmth on his skin he nodded, taking one last shaky breath before he opened his eyes to gaze at Cas once again.

“Good,” Cas breathed, and he could feel the warmth ghosting over his lips, “do you have your duffel with you?”

“Yeah, it's in the trunk of my car.”

“Go get it, change backstage, and meet me center stage when you're ready.”

He nodded again then shook his head and whispered, more to himself then to Cas, “I can’t believe I'm doing this,” then turned and left the theater.

~~~~~~~~~~~

A few minutes later Dean was standing just off to the side of the stage, in the shadows behind the curtains, taking deep breaths as he watched Cas standing in the center. After one last breath he stepped out, slowly, cautiously, eyes wide as he saw everyone sitting in the seats below the stage, the directors dead center and eyes on him. He stopped walking and froze before he made it to Cas. 

“Dean,” he heard Cas’s voice, but couldn't even move to look up at him, “Dean.”

He heard his voice that time and looked up. Cas was holding out a hand to him, waiting patiently for him to walk over, which he eventually did, very slowly. 

He reached out and took Cas’s outstretched hand, allowing Cas to pull him in close to his chest, pressing their foreheads together. “It's just like at the studio, Dean. Dance like it's just you and me up here, together and alone. Just focus on me, nothing else.”

“But Cas, we haven't done the final dance together yet,” he risked a glance over to where the directors were sitting, looking a bit impatient now, “it's the only part of the ballet we haven't gotten to yet.”

“But you know the steps, Dean.”

“Yeah, but.”

“But nothing,” he reached up and ran the back of his hand down Dean's cheek, “you can do this. Show them just how amazing you are, how amazing I know you are.”

Dean nodded, then he and Cas separated to stand in their positions. Cas looked down to the composer with a nod to signal him to start the music, then looked over to Dean. He could tell Dean was nervous, shaking slightly and fiddling with his hands, so he called over to him and got his attention. “Just you and me, Dean.”

He swallowed hard but told himself that Cas was right. He just needed to pretend that no one else was there, the theater was empty, it was just him and Cas same as it was every other time they've danced together. So he closed his eyes, erased everything and everyone from his mind except Cas, and as the music started he smoothly transitioned into the steps he knew so well. 

It was an almost instant change from Dean to Clara as he practically jumped into the roll, and he and Cas were moving as one. Despite the two of them having never actually practiced this dance together, they were in perfect sync, it was as if they had danced it a million times together. Every move they made, every step, every breath was taken as one, right up until the final note and they were standing frozen in their final position. They were chest to chest and nose to nose, a breath away, breathing hard after having given the most amazing performance together. And they had been here before, Dean thought, pulled together feeling this fire between them, and everytime he waited for Cas to take that final step. To close the gap…

“That! Was! Magnificent!” Clapping from the seats below them had them turning their heads away from each other snapping back to reality, still breathless from the dance and pure intensity between them, their chests heaving together. “I… I am absolutely blown away! You were splendid, Dean, splendid!”

“Especially for someone who has never had any formal training before,” Metatron joined Chuck in his standing ovation, “where did you learn to move like that?”

Cas nudged a blushing Dean forward to the edge of the stage and urged him to answer, though he could tell that he was still nervous and obviously not used to the attention and praise over his dancing. “I… I taught myself, actually. I used online video tutorials, and also just watched and studied other dancers. And Cas, he's helped me to perfect my moves, I wouldn't be anywhere near this good if it wasn't for him.”

Dean turned to gaze at Cas with a smile. He still had an arm wrapped around Dean and was looking down at him with as much adoration as Dean was at him. 

“And you were right, Castiel,” Chuck nudged Metatron beside him, and the two of them smirked as they looked up at the two dancers wrapped in each other on stage, “the chemistry between the two of you is perfect!”

“Chuck’s right,” Metatron spoke as he started walking up the steps to join them, and Chuck followed, “who needs that stuck up, snobby diva Ruby when we have you, Dean!”

“I-”

“And you are right, Castiel, bringing Dean on will change the dynamic of the original story, but this could be a monumental step for us!” Chuck then turned to Metatron as the two of them both started getting very excited about the thought of two male leads. “The first Nutcracker with two male leads! This could be big! We could be big!”

“So what do you say, Dean? Take the position!” Both of them locked their eyes on Dean, almost boring into him with an intensity that he felt in his soul. 

“I…” He looked up at Cas, then just shook his head, “I don't know.”

“W-what do you mean you don't know?” Chuck was baffled, “People would kill to be in your position right now. An unknown dancer, picked off the streets and given the opportunity to play one of the lead roles in what is surely going to be a ballet to remember?! You could become a legend in dance.”

“I’m a bit of a closeted dancer. No one knows that I dance besides Castiel, and now you guys. It's…” He took a hard breath and let it out slow, “It's hard to openly be this person after I've been someone else my entire life. People expect me to be a certain way, and this sudden change could cause me to lose so much.”

“But also gain even more!” Metatron reached out and placed a hand on Dean's shoulder.

“I…”

Cas pulled Dean closer to his side, shielding him from his directors who he knew could sometimes go a little overboard. Not to mention the fact that he knew pressuring Dean like this was only going to make it worse, make his nerves worse. “We don't have another rehearsal for a few days. Let's give Dean some time to think about the offer before anyone makes any decisions.”

“You’re right, you're right.” They both raised their hands and took a step back. “Think about it Dean, take some time to make your decision, but while you think about it, know that we would absolutely love to have you with us!”

“If it's alright, I'll let you know by the next rehearsal.”

Chuck and Metatron both told Dean to take his time with the decision, but they both were praying that he would agree. Seeing the two of them dance together was an opportunity they really didn't want to have to pass up on. After which, Dean changed backstage, said his thanks to the directors, and then Cas walked him back out to his car.

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Dean plopped himself hard on the floor and sat back against the mirror of the dance studio he shared with Cas. He was sweating and panting, he had been working harder this week then he ever had during practices, and he was more than sure that it was because he was trying to keep a certain decision from creeping into his mind every time he let it wander.

Cas came over to sit next to him, passing Dean a bottle of water as he did, and sat in silence for a few minutes. And though he knew that Cas was trying to give him as much time as he needed to make the decision about the position at the ballet, Dean could feel the tension and curiosity radiating off of him the entire night. 

He took a drink then huffed to try and catch his breath before eyeing Cas from the side, “Alright, ask me.”

“Ask you what, Dean?” He tried to feign innocence but it was not fooling Dean.

“Don't try to play me, Cas,” he shook his head and shifted to turn towards Cas, “I know you want to ask me about taking the position, if I've made my decision yet. And I guess I should give you an answer, considering the next rehearsal is tomorrow night.”

Cas nodded, then he also turned so they were now facing each other, and tangled their legs together, “Well then, have you come to a decision?” Dean just sighed and lowered his head. “If it helps any, I would be there with you every step of the way, quite literally. Not to mention that I would love to be performing the ballet with you.”

“It helps a little,” he couldn't help but smile a bit, “but I… I don't know, Cas. If I do go through with this then eventually, at some point, my family is going to find out one way or another. Either I'll have to tell them, or someone in town will tell them, and I… I just don't want them to be disappointed in me.”

Cas shuffled closer to Dean, the two of them wrapping their legs around each other as Cas placed his forehead to rest against Dean’s. “Perhaps they will not be disappointed, but proud.”

“But what if they aren’t proud? What if they think my dad was right? That I should be playing sports not dancing around a stage in tights?!”

“Dean, calm down,” he smoothed his hands down Dean's neck, “you will never know until you try, and if they end up being angry or disappointed then that's their loss. No matter what happens I will still be right beside you. But it's time to stop hiding it, Dean, it's time to be you.”

“Yeah,” he swallowed hard, but nodded, “you're right. It's… it's time I think about what I want and not what my father would have wanted for me. And… and if someones upset about that then that's not my problem.”

“Exactly. You are an amazing person, Dean, anyone would be a fool not to see it.” Dean smiled and ran his hands up and into Cas’s hair, the two just sitting there for a minute before Cas asked, “So, does that mean you'll take the part?”

“Yeah, I'll take the part.”

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

After Dean went back to the theater with Cas and accepted the part, the directors were thrilled. Dean was extremely nervous, but as Cas had promised he was right there beside Dean through every step. 

They had been rehearsing for a few weeks now, and Dean had taken to his new role splendidly. Everyone in the theater was more than pleased with his performance during rehearsals, many of them gushing over the fact that it was going to be the best rendition of The Nutcracker to be performed in years, even decades maybe.

As Castiel had said before, they did end up making a few alterations to the ballet, one of them being that they changed Dean's role from Clara to Charles, as well as a few alterations to the ending. But despite the last minute changes that were made after Ruby's abrupt exit, the entire cast was very excited to be finally sharing their hard work with many people all across the country. 

They had just finished up with one of their last rehearsals before the tickets for the show were to go live, and Dean and Cas were getting ready to leave for the night when their directors came over to them, each handing them a bundle of tickets.

Dean took them and rolled them over in his hand before asking with a raised brow, “What are these for?”

“Castiel told us you live with your mom and brother, right?” Chuck asked.

“Yeah…” He drawled, now a little worried.

“These tickets are for them,” Chuck confirmed Dean's fears, “front row seats for the debut show. Word has been getting around about our ballet having two male leads and the theater is already getting calls about buying tickets. We are expecting to be sold out of all shows within a day, so we reserved a few tickets for the families of each of our cast and crew members.”

“Oh...wow, I…” He stuttered, not really knowing what to say. Not to mention that his heart was now down in his feet at the mere thought of even humouring telling his mom and brother about the show. Was it naive to think that he could just keep it a secret forever?

“No need to thank us,” Metatron smiled at him, not knowing how much dread was running through his veins right now, “We hope to meet them on opening night. Have a good night you two.”

Dean just kind of nodded as they walked away. He was unusually quiet as Cas walked him out to his car like he did every night after rehearsals. Then sat in his car for a few minutes before finally driving home, trying to figure out exactly how he was going to do this without either crying, throwing up, passing out, or quite possibly all three. It was bound to be a super fun weekend.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When Dean got home from rehearsals that night it was still pretty early. His mom and brother were still asleep, which he decided was for the better, seeing as his stomach was still turning pretty bad. The tickets were weighing heavily in his duffle that was slung over his shoulder, he could practically feel them burning a hole through the bag. But he pushed the thought aside for now since they were still passed out in bed, and decided to occupy his mind with doing some laundry instead. His tights were a complete mess from rehearsals this week and he would rather just get it done now before his mom and Sam woke up. 

He went straight to the laundry room as soon as he got inside and tossed his duffel bag on top of the washing machine. Before he threw it in the machine he quickly bound up the stairs to his room to grab the special fabric softener he had bought for himself, partly because he liked the smell, but mostly because he knew Cas liked it.

He grabbed the fabric softener then took a moment to sit on his bed, rehearsals lately had been taking a lot out of him. As it got closer and closer to opening night, rehearsals got more and more intense. He placed the bottle on his nightstand and before he knew it, he was laying back on the bed. Just a minute, he thought, then he would get up and do his laundry. Then his eyes were closing and he decided he would let them, just rest them for a few seconds then he would get up. But before he could even stop himself he was passed out with his legs hanging over the edge of his bed, laundry completely forgotten.

~~~~~~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go! If you guys want I can publish the last chapter tomorrow! <3


	3. Chapter 3

He woke up to the sun blasting through a crack in his curtains, hitting him perfectly across the eyes. He rubbed his face as he slowly sat up in bed, feeling a bit better then he had when he first came home, and wondered how long he had slept. Looking at the clock and seeing it was now after nine, and he had managed to get a decent few hours sleep, he decided to head down to the kitchen and see who was up. Sam was usually an early bird and most times already had breakfast ready by the time Dean decided to roll down stairs. 

When he got there Sam was in the kitchen, showered, dressed, and stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce he was making for dinner. And just as Dean had expected, there was a fresh pot of coffee made and a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast waiting for him on the counter. 

He walked over and sat down on one of the stools at the island, watching Sam as he ate, "Where's Mom?"

"Around somewhere," he answered, as he turned and placed a cup of coffee in front of Dean, "she was up before I was today."

He nodded and focused on finishing his food, then thanked Sam before heading through the house to go find their mom. He walked down the hall and heard the slam of the dryer door in the laundry room, so he took a hard right and found her inside. Though his smile instantly dropped when he saw her, his entire body froze, and every limb hummed with anxiety while all he could do was stare at his mom, holding two things in her hands staring at them in confusion.

The first was the tickets Dean had been given by the directors of the ballet, the ones that were meant for her and Sam. The second… was Dean's tights. 

"Mom…" He finally managed to breathe out, and she turned to look at him. 

"Dean, what… what is this? Are they yours?"

"Why do you have those? Why were you in my bag?"

"You were sleeping, and I saw your bag on the washing machine," she tried to speak calmly, not wanting Dean to freak out, seeing he was clearly on the brink of a meltdown, "I figured since you seemed so tired lately I would do your laundry for you. But what is this? Are you… are you in this show?"

He was pretty much in tears now, he was so scared. He wanted to do this differently, he wanted to tell them on his own terms, when he felt ready, not have his mom find out on her own because he forgot he left his bag on the washing machine. "I forgot I left my bag here. I… I…"

Mary just calmly reached out and took Dean by the shoulders, gently guiding him to the kitchen and sitting him at the table. She sat across from him, staring helplessly at him as he just placed his head on his hands, fingers wringing tightly in his hair, knuckles white.

"Woah," Sam dropped the wooden spoon on the counter with a clatter and practically ran around the counter to sit beside Dean at the table, "what's going on?!"

"Dean, talk to us, Honey," Mary tried to get him to look up but he wouldn't budge, "Were those tights yours?"

"Tights?!" Sam looked between them. 

"I… I couldn't tell you." He shook his head, hands still over his eyes, "I was afraid."

"Tell us what, Dean,?" Sam tried this time, placing a hand on Dean's shaking shoulder. 

"Why not, Honey?"

"Dad…" He finally lifted his head slightly out of his hands, wiping the tears that had smudged all over his face now, though still not making eye contact with anyone. "Dad would never want me to be the person I am, he would be disappointed."

"Disappointed about what, Dean?!" Sam moved to get into Dean's eye line but he quickly darted his eyes away. "You're a great person, why would anyone be disappointed in you? What could you have done that's so wrong?"

Dean just shook his head and closed his eyes, the sobs coming back a little harder now. Mary reached over the table and managed to get ahold of one of his to squeeze it comfortingly. "Tell Sam, it's okay."

"I…" He tried to look at Sam but he couldn't. He was afraid that just because his dad was gone and he couldn't see the look of disappointment on his face, he still might see it on Sam's. But he forced it out anyways, since there was no going back now, "I… dance."

"Okay," Sam shrugged his bottom lip and shook his head, seemingly unfazed, "I still don't understand why you're crying though. Lots of people dance, many of them are amazingly talented, so why are you so upset?"

"But I'm a ballet dancer, Sam! Not some crazy cool hip hop dancer that you're probably thinking of, no, I dance around the stage in girly tights!" He slammed a fist down on the table, making Sam jump a little. "And the tickets Mom found in my bag, along with my tights, were for the performance I am going to be in. I am part of the Kansas State Ballet's rendition of The Nutcracker."

"You… you dance ballet?" Sam smiled a bit at the thought, "Dean Winchester, the manliest man of all men to ever man, dances ballet?"

"This is exactly why I didn't say anything," Dean just shook his head and wiped away more stray tears, "Dad would have killed me if he ever found out that I loved ballet, let alone taught myself the skill. He wanted me to be the manly man that everyone knows and thinks I am, not some pansy dancing around the stage in tights."

"But, Dean, that's awesome!" Dean turned to Sam, a little startled. "Ballet’s actually one of the most intense dance forms out there! It's so powerful, and moving. And the fact that you taught yourself the art, and are a part of a state ballet group, is something that a lot of classically trained dancers could never even come close to be able to do!"

"But… Dad-"

“Your father is gone now, Honey, has been for four years," she gave his hand a squeeze again, and this time she managed to catch his eye, "you have to stop looking over your shoulder and expecting him to be there. It's only holding you back. He would have been proud of you no matter what, he loved you."

"Would he still be proud if he knew I wore tights and danced in pointe shoes?"

Mary shrugged, "He might have been a little sad that you didn't want to follow in his footsteps and fall into sports, but he would have supported you regardless. I know he seemed like a hardened man, but he loved you boys. And now it's time for you to just let go of that past and be yourself, Dean.” 

Dean shook his head vigorously, gasping out, "I can't,"

“You can.” She assured him in her most firm mom voice she could muster.

"You don't understand!" Dean nearly screamed, "It is hardwired into my brain that I shouldn't be this way! I should be covered in dirt sliding across a baseball diamond, or sweating through my gear on the ice, not dancing in skin tight outfits and sparkles. He would hate me, he would hate everything I am!"

"No he wouldn't," she said softly and shook her head, "but that doesn't matter anymore, Dean, this is your time to be you, and I wish you would have told me sooner rather than suppressing this obvious passion. I want you to be happy, Dean, and if ballet is it for you then that is perfectly fine! Just be you, please, Honey.” 

He didn't say anymore after that. Just sat at the table for most of the day, contemplating everything that his mom and brother had said, and what he was going to do about it. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

It was their last rehearsal before they would open to the public. Opening night was right around the corner. Everyone was a cluster of excitement and nerves, buzzing around the theater, the knowledge that their tickets had sold out seconds after being released was making the atmosphere even more intense. The entire cast was reeling, well, everyone except Dean. He still hadn't shown up at the theater yet, he was almost an hour late for the rehearsal, and Cas was starting to get worried. Along with others. 

"Have you heard from him, Castiel?" Cas just shook his head at a worried Chuck from center stage, "Has anyone heard from Dean?!"

He ran through the theater, asking everyone about Dean as the rest of the cast waited patiently on stage. Cas just stood there alone, worried, waiting along with everyone else, his body tingling with fear that maybe Dean wasn't coming back. Maybe this was it, maybe he had decided he didn't want this anymore, or his family didn't want it. 

He listened to the hushed conversations around him, trying to focus on that for a moment, but that didn't help. For the very first thing he heard was one of the female dancers saying to another, “I overheard him saying yesterday that he was going home to tell his family about the show, he was worried it wouldn’t go over well. I hope everything’s okay.”

And if Castiel's heart wasn't already in his feet. But then suddenly pounding footsteps came from Castiel's right and he turned to see Dean bouncing across the stage to stand next to him. "I'm here, sorry I'm so late!"

Both Chuck and Metatron breathed hard sighs of relief and said, “Oh thank heavens!”

"I just had some things to clear up back home, I'm really sorry!" The directors both waved him off, just thankful their other star was still here. Then he turned his attention to Cas at his side and smiled, a little twinkle in his eye as he said only to him, "I'm ready for this, I'm ready to just be me."

"Shall we get this final rehearsal on the road then?!" Metarton waved his hands in the air and everyone started running around them. "Places people, places!"

Cas walked over with a matching smile to Dean’s and took both his hands in his own. He didn't say anything, he didn't need to, neither of them did. So instead he just lifted Dean's hands to his mouth, placed a gentle kiss on the knuckles of each hand, and then moved back to get in his place. The whole time the two of them never took their eyes off one another, even as the orchestra started playing their final dance.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It was finally opening night and Dean had never been so god damn nervous in his entire life. He was currently standing backstage in full costume, peeking out the curtain at the completely full seats, people packing into the theater, and his heart was pounding out of his chest. Then he looked to the front row and saw his mom and Sam, sitting in the seats given to them by the directors, and then both Chuck and Metatron waltzed through the orchestra to introduce themselves to them. That made his nerves even worse, he was sure his heart was going to pop out of his chest and explode, and he had the sudden urge to whip off his pointe shoes and get the hell outta dodge. But then there were hands on his shoulders, rubbing up and down his arms, steadying and grounding. "Cas," he breathed and leaned back.

"You're nervous," he whispered into Dean's ear as he leaned impossibly closer to Cas. 

He nodded, "Sammy's here, and my mom, talking to Chuck and Metatron," he let out a long shuddering sigh, "what if they hate it? What if I mess up because they're watching?! What if everyone laughs at me?! Cas!"

He turned Dean towards him and pulled him into a tight hug, Dean wrapping his arms around his neck and digging his face in, "You're spiraling, Dean," he rubbed his hands soothingly up and down his back, "you have nothing to worry about. I promise that not just your family, but everyone in the audience will love your performance. You will not fall, because I will always catch you. And no one will laugh at you, because if they do they will have to answer to me."

Dean chuckled against Cas's neck as Cas continued, "You will be fine. You know the dances inside and out, you know every single move, every line." Cas kept going as he felt Dean relaxing, and started moving his hands up Dean's sides to his arms, then his hands, twisting him around and resting his head on his shoulder, wrapping their clasped hands around Dean and holding him tightly to his chest. "And you know me, and I know you. When we dance together our bodies are one and it is just you and I on the stage together, just us. That's all you need to remember, and if you feel like you are starting to slip, just reach out your hand and I will be there, I promise."

Dean just nodded and inhaled deeply, trying to calm himself, and it definitely helped when Cas gently pressed his lips to Dean's neck. Not so much a kiss but it was oh so comforting. 

They stayed like that for a while, as long as they could, Cas's lips still pressed to Dean's neck and rocking them softly back and forth. Until the lights started to flicker, the signal for everyone to take their seats and for the cast and crew to take their positions. 

Cas gave Dean one last hug before pulling back and taking Dean's hands in his, lifting them to his mouth to do his new favourite thing, and placed a kiss on the knuckles of each hand. Then moved across the stage to stand on the other side facing Dean. 

His nerves came back a bit now that Cas was gone, he could still see him but not having his hands on him was unsettling him again, and even more so when he heard Chuck and Metatron on the other side of the curtain, addressing the audience before the show would start. 

"Welcome everyone to the Kansas State Ballet's rendition of The Nutcracker!" Metatron announced and claps and cheers filled the air. 

"Though," Chuck stepped in, "we got off to a pretty rocky start, didn't we."

Metatron chuckled, "That we did, but maybe for the better!"

"Very true," Chuck nodded, then turned to the audience, "early on in rehearsals we had a small bump, that being that our original lead of Clara had to… unexpectedly leave us. But, in place of her, we were gifted an angel, your very own, champion of dance, hometown boy, Dean Winchester!"

From backstage Dean could hear everyone cheering, clapping louder than before, and the undeniable Sam Winchester whistle and hollar combo, which he had to admit eased his nerves just a bit. And Chuck and Metatron went on. 

"Well, look at us, gushing over our stars," Metatron laughed, "we should just let you see for yourselves the pure, raw chemistry and talent that we have discovered here. Allow us to let Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak steal your hearts as they have ours."

"So, without further ado," Chuck said just before they backed away to duck backstage, "we give you, The Nutcracker!"

They both backed away, tucked themselves backstage to watch their masterpiece unfold, as the curtain opened and the lights shone hot and bright on the stage. 

Dean took a deep breath, the worst part of this ballet was that he had to do the first act without Cas, before the Nutcracker Prince came in to play. But he looked over at Cas, still standing directly across from him, and he gave him a reassuring smile and gestured to himself and Dean. Just you and I together, Dean thought, I'm dancing for Cas. And with a smile and a new found burst of energy he bounded across the stage to give the best performance he could.

~~~~~~~~~~~

As the show went on and Dean was finally able to get to dance with Cas, his very own Nutcracker Prince, that chemistry that Chuck and Metatron had spoken of came in full force. 

Sam watched in complete awe from the front row as his brother moved on stage before him. He had never seen Dean so happy, so powerful, so amazing! And the way he danced with the other lead, it was such an intense form of intimacy, of pure completeness, that Sam was sure the entire audience could feel it. The atmosphere around him was on fire, and everyone in the audience was on the edge of their seats through the entire performance. 

The ballet had everything, Sam thought as his eyes opened impossibly wider with each passing act. Crazy fights, ups, downs, emotions, romance, devastation, and love. And all too soon for him, and everyone else watching, it was too quickly coming to an end. 

He watched as the Nutcracker Prince and Charles came together for their final dance, and he had to admit that he was slightly jealous at the way Dean and the Nutcracker were looking at each other. But he was oh so happy for his brother, he was finally truly happy. 

Sparks were clearly flying between them, and as the orchestra played the final notes of the song, Charles and his Nutcracker Prince held their ending poses and the entire audience rose to their feet. Not a single person wasn't standing, not a single eye was dry, and that included both Chuck and Metatron who walked slightly out on the stage, both cheering as loud as everyone else was. 

And just before the other dancers joined them on stage for a bow, Cas couldn't resist doing what he had been wanting to do for so long. Both of them panting, gazing deeply at each other, Dean's pure blissful smile that he knew was only there for him, and Cas knew what would make the perfect ending to this night. So he pulled lightly on Dean's hand in his and he bounced forwards into Castiel's arms. And right there, in front of everyone in the audience, Cas dipped Dean backwards and finally, finally kissed Dean. 

The audience erupted impossibly louder, but Dean and Cas didn't even hear it. It was just the two of them. Dean clutched tighter to Cas as he dipped him a little further back, and Dean ran his hands up to clutch Cas's face as the cast around them bowed, and the curtain closed in front of them. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Castiel's lips were on his for what felt like a blissful eternity, lips and tongue moving with Dean's as if they were built perfectly for each other. And Dean never wanted it to end, but eventually it had to. 

One of their celebrating cast members bumped into them as they bounced by, excited over a perfect performance, and Cas gave Dean one last long kiss before they pulled apart and Cas stood them back up. 

Dean was even more breathless now then he had been after the dance had ended. Kissing Cas was something he had wanted to do since the very first moment he saw him dancing in that studio, and all he could do was smile and even blush a little as he pulled Cas's forehead to rest on his, "It's about time."

Cas chuckled, his chest vibrating against Dean's as he did, and pulled Dean in even closer, "Wanted to do that for a very long time now."

"Me too, Cas."

They stood together for a moment before Cas said, "You were amazing, Dean."

"So were you," he nuzzled his nose against Cas's, leaning in a little closer for another kiss, "I wouldn't have been able to do all of this if it wasn't for you."

Before they could kiss again, a screech was heard from off to the side, startling them both as well as silencing the entire cast and crew still backstage. Cas clutched a little tighter to Dean, but Dean just laughed and hid his face in Cas's shoulder before he turned slightly, still holding Cas.

"Mom," he laughed as she came running through the parting crowd towards them, nearly crashing into them, "stop freaking out, it's embarrassing."

She pulled him away from Cas and into the tightest bear hug he had ever been in, "You were amazing, Honey, so absolutely amazing!"

"Mom's right, Dean," Sam came up behind them, taking his turn to hug Dean, "that was the best performance I have ever seen! It had everything! I was literally on the edge of my seat the entire time!"

"Thanks, Sammy! And I’m glad you're here cuz there’s someone I want you to meet," Dean said as he backed up, rubbing the back of his neck. Then he turned back and took Castiel's hand, bringing him forwards a bit, "this is Cas, the other lead and… and…"

Dean stuttered, not exactly sure what to say, especially while his mom and brother were staring at him so intensely. Not to mention the all too knowing matching Winchester smirks they were sending his way. So Cas stepped forward, hand outstretched towards them, "I'm Dean's boyfriend."

Boyfriend, Dean thought, and his stomach had butterflies again, though this time the good kind. And he couldn't help but laugh as his boyfriend's hand was swatted away by Sam, and he was taken in a Winchester group hug, while Sam patted his back and said, "Welcome to the family, man!" Then backed away and held out two bouquets of flowers to the both of them, "And these are for you guys, congrats on an amazing first performance, and many more to come!"

"Thanks, Sammy," Dean said as he took it, then settled himself against Cas's side again, "it means a lot that you guys liked the show."

"We really did, Honey, and we’re so proud of you, both of you." She stood between them for one more hug and a kiss on each boy's cheek before backing away and saying, "alright, you two change and then I'm taking you both to dinner, on me. Sammy and I will wait for you by the car."

Dean watched them go with a smile as Cas pulled him a little closer so he could kiss his cheek. "Your family is great, I am glad to be a part of it."

"They're a little crazy but I love them," he said and turned a bit, smiling at Cas, "almost as much as I love you."

"And I love you, Dean," he said as he leaned in, pressing his lips to Dean's in an almost kiss, "I am so very glad that you snuck into that dance studio and watched me dancing like a creeper."

Dean couldn't help but laugh against Cas's lips and said, "Me too, Cas, me too," and closed the gap between them. Dean was pleased that everything had turned out better than he had ever thought it would, and that the ballet had been a winning performance, but of all of that the only thing that he really cared about was that the man in his arms, currently kissing him absolutely senseless, was finally all his. His very own Nutcracker Prince.

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that'd the end friends! My one shot that turned into a three chapter fic lol  
> I hope everyone liked it, and thank to everyone for reading and commenting <3 Love you guys!

**Author's Note:**

> So this started out as just a short Christmas fic, and then it got a little carried away XD And it has since turned into a three chapter fic. And I hope you enjoy <3


End file.
